The prosecution: Helen
We trained our dog be gentle. Now we have a baby, why would we take such a huge risk?
We got our big white German shepherd, Eddie, almost two years ago. He was a compromise: I wanted a second baby, but Roger said only if we could get a second dog.
Roger is an amputee, and having a dog is great for his disability. Having to be at home more with our first baby was hard on him, so Eddie has been brilliant. Roger has taught him amazing stuff. When they go to the park together, a crowd will gather and watch them do tricks. Eddie’s recall is great and he hangs on Roger’s every word. But it was difficult, too, as at first Eddie didn’t get on well with our other dog, Kady, and having a puppy at the same time as a newborn is a challenge.
Now Roger wants to enter Eddie in a German shepherd competition called IGP, a dog sport that evaluates tracking, obedience and protection. To join, he would need to start teaching Eddie bite work. I’m apprehensive. You hear of cases of German shepherds biting a family member. Eddie has learned not to bite: you can put your hand in his mouth and he’s really gentle. To undo that training would be really risky.
Our baby can be unpredictable. What if he freaks Eddie out and it leads to a confrontation? One time, when Roger’s brother came in our back door and did a silly dance, Eddie really didn’t like it. If he had been trained to bite, might it have been worse? If Eddie thinks we are under threat, he might attack people. Also, legally, once you teach your dog to bite, you are personally liable for whatever they do. Our insurance would no longer be valid.
We discussed all this but a few months ago Roger bought a bite wedge to start training Eddie without my permission. I was livid when I found it. I hid it in the changing table (somewhere Roger never goes) and he begged me to tell him where it was until I caved. Sometimes we agree on things and I think it’s sorted, then I find out he’s gone behind my back. While he has worked so hard with Eddie and he’s a brilliant dog, I don’t think competing should be an avenue for him. It’s not worth the risk.
The defence: Roger
Eddie will still be the same dog even if I teach him to bite, and him competing would fulfill my dream
I’m pleased Helen said Eddie is well behaved, because he really is. Eddie is a boisterous male, but our baby can pull his tail and you would never be worried about him reacting. We bought him for £900 and someone once offered us £9,000 for him when they saw how well behaved he is.
I don’t think learning to bite would make him any less safe. It’s genetics or fear that makes a dog attack. Police dogs don’t just randomly turn if they are well trained. Suppose the terrible thing happened and Eddie did go mad – if he’s trained to bite and then leave it, he will be safer than a dog who has never been trained. When you watch a police dog bite, its tail wags because it is actually having a really fun time. It’s a game to them.
Eddie forces me to go out and walk every day, which is key to my mental and physical health. I would love to quit my job and train dogs if I could, but the next step is to compete.
IGP was developed as the breeding standard for German shepherds in Germany and has now evolved into a competition. It’s really choreographed: walk two steps, bite for three seconds, that kind of thing. It’s not aggressive. The dog is just having a good time in a perfectly controlled way, but Helen thinks it will be too risky with the dog at home afterwards.
When I got the bite wedge for Eddie, I was a little drunk at the pub and just ordered it on a whim from Amazon. I think I was quite graceful and apologised to Helen for going behind her back but she says I pleaded and whined to have it back after she hid it. But as of now, the wedge is still in its packaging and hasn’t been opened.
I asked IGP if Eddie could compete in all the other areas and not do the biting stuff, but they said no. I did think about training other dogs. I wondered if I could volunteer with the police, but the answer was no. I looked at other dog competitions like Crufts but border collies really dominate those. IGP is perfect, as it’s just for German shepherds. I really want Eddie to compete, but if we can’t get him biting, he’s not allowed to enter.
The jury of Guardian readers
Is Roger barking up the wrong tree with his plan to train Eddie to bite?
Helen and Roger seem to have a very complicated relationship. I appreciate how much of a lifeline and mental health support dogs are, but the lack of consideration for Helen’s concerns is a red flag. Roger should pause and consider what is more important to him in the long term. If it’s his family, he must find a compromise.
Eilish, 57
Why is biting a necessary next step? If Roger must devote so much energy to his dog – rather than his child – he should consider teaching it how to fetch and bin nappies. Helen, insist that Roger starts changing his baby!
Molly, 32
It’s great that Eddie’s such a good companion and motivator for Roger, but the risks of a trained German shepherd biting someone are very real. To put competing ahead of his children’s safety and wife’s concerns is selfish. A career change to dog training could be a better goal for Roger to work towards.
Sudevi, 36
Roger seems to be prioritising the dog’s career over his family’s wellbeing. Focusing on child-safe fun would put Helen’s mind at ease. Her comment that Roger “never goes” to the changing table suggests he’d do well to pay less attention to bite training and more to his baby.
Juliette, 24
Roger is putting his own obsession above his role as partner and parent. A bitey dog is a happy dog? Irrelevant. Eddie sounds happy already, Helen less so (and what about their baby?). There must be alternatives to turning your pet into a fully trained police dog.
Lindsey, 43
Now you be the judge
In our online poll, tell us: is Roger’s argument champ?
The poll closes on 12 September at 10am BST
Last week’s result
We asked whether Derren should listen to his girlfriend Margy and start double-knotting his shoelaces.
58% of you said yes: Derren is guilty
42% of you said no: Derren is innocent